Hey, hey, are you ok?
Yeah, Vagina. I was sleeping.
I know. It’s been over a week. What are you a bear hibernating?
No, Vagina, I’m recovering.
You’re recovering? Have you seen me yet?
No! That was the purpose of this surgery. Why are you still talking to me.
I don’t know. Maybe, just maybe, because I’m your vagina. I’m still here. You might have hired a meat cutter to contortion me into a ball and stitch me up in here, but I’m still here.
He’s a surgeon! Vagina he is very well respected urogynecologist surgeon at that.
All right, all right, I just wanted to check in on you. I’m not here to argue meat butcher, organ contortionist or surgeon whatever he is, the work is done. I’m no longer hanging out by your knees, I’m back to where I came from. I just wanted to see how you’re holding up?
I’m better, Vagina. Now, that I’m on antibiotics. When I woke up Sunday, I was not certain I would make it. Man, I smelled awful. it smelt like a dead animal in the house.
You’re telling me. I was that smell. I was the dead animal rotting inside of you. I was freaking out that the angel of death was going to come rip my soul away.
Vagina, you don’t have a soul.
How do you know I don’t have a soul? Remember the woman next to you in the recovery room? She got silent and then poof her soul just left her body. Don’t tell me that souls don’t exist.
Vagina, she’s a woman of course she has a soul. Vagina you’re an organ, no soul. You’re just a body part.
That’s rough. You can’t just go around telling things they don’t have a soul. Would you say that to your dog or your friends? Hmm…
No, Vagina. Dogs have souls. Women have souls. People have souls. Organs like you, Vagina, live inside of dogs, women, people. Well, not all people. Well, then again, maybe in some people. I mean now that I think about I’m not really sure.
Forget it! Forget about it! I just wanted to check in on you. We’re supposed to be a team you and me. I just wanted to make sure we’re not going to the promise land any time soon.
Ok, Vagina, I’m sorry. Let’s just presume if we are a team here, you and me, that in the promise land we’re a team too.
That sounds nice. Well, since I’m back home I might as well get comfortable.